Author: marilyn

… since my weekly blog post was scheduled, a lot’s been happening.  But I do like to remain committed.  To my writing.

If you’re interested in Astrology, it’s possible you’ve heard about the Cardinal Grand Cross forming in our skies… and both a New Moon and Full Moon Eclipse.  Big month April.  Oh, and of course, the 5th exact Pluto/Uranus ‘square’…  a challenging, growth promoting, life changing, world changing energy in our current world.

The energies are big, they illicit a response.  But how we respond is our choice.

I’ve been aware of my body for a while now.  Those who don’t know, I ‘stopped’ back in March 2011.  My central nervous system decided to wave the white flag…. ‘truce please truce’.  I’m not an easy one to stop.  I still struggle and resist.  I’m a Virgo, I like to do things.  Makes things neat and tidy, to heal and make beautiful.  That’s not too much to ask, is it?

My focus these last three years has been healing.  I have a strong drive to improve, to discover, to move beyond our current understanding.  To grow, to learn, to share.  Life is a magickal journey of discovery.  I like to look towards the sky, that ever protective arc of blue.  The distant planets and stars sitting gloriously in our evening sky.  I feel the earth beneath my feet… the love travels through my meridians, to my energy centres, feeding my body and nourishing my emotions.  We’ve been created from the intelligence of Life, awesome material, the primordial flame that keeps our inner core alight.

We’re pretty cool stuff…

Back to my body, back to my needs.. (it’s easy for me to be diverted from this).  I’ve been finding things a peep overwhelming of late.  I don’t experience this as often as I did.  I’ve been building my muscles.  Yes, I know… the Cardinal Grand Cross, the two Eclipses.  And my natal Moon is joining in this massive joining in the sky.  My Moon… she’s really on display.  She usually likes to keep a low profile, which really p….eaves Miss Venus in Leo.  But she’s taken on the vibrations of Capricorn and Saturn, she can be a little serious and ever hardworking. And sitting in Scorpio’s house, the 8th… she’s pretty private, and a wee bit psychic.  So many feelings everywhere… I need recovery time, every time I go out.  Even a trip to Woodenbong (a little village) will do it.  It’s great being sensitive… but geez.

It seems to take a lot of connection to myself… to really trust my first instinct.  I have a therapist friend who use to remind me of that quite regularly.  I can be a slow learner, for one who was gifted a keen intelligence.  Then again I live differently now, I’m sixty-five and I live in the country… and have a strong desire to write, and take photos.  Forever trying to capture the beauty.  But alas, Beauty cannot be caught.  This growing awareness happening within me… that changes are required and soon.  I need a hand, I do… to caretake this special place.  Or is it time to move on, I don’t know.  Different cycles require different things.

There’s no need to go into reasons.  I just need to listen to my needs.  I know what my intentions are, they’re quite clear… I’m healing.  That’s first on my list.  I’m healing something that has been with me a very long time, most of my life.  That doesn’t daunt me… everything improves if given the chance, with time.  We need to set our levels high.  This is our life, it’s an important time.

So much more is now understood.  Well, some were aware a long time ago… but as a collective we take a bit longer to get it.  Many new discoveries now… of how the body and mind function.  I suspect we see only a little.  Life is magick, it is… that’s how it was made.  We were created to enjoy, to experience love and peace in our lives.  We were created by one that was very, very kind.

So what are the changes that are required?  From me?  What do I need to do differently?  I live on a beautiful property, a gorgeous house that’s quite substantial, I like my environment to be cared for… loved and given attention.  I purchased this property with a definite goal in mind.  I was going to open a rural Healing Retreat space, I’d had the vision for many years.  I’d already created a Healing Centre in the city, that was only eight years ago now… gosh so much has changed in that time.  Hasn’t it?  I know it has for me.

I use to be a little Energizer Bunny.  Gosh,when I think of what I use to do.  I was driven to do, to improve… to make beautiful, to heal.  In Chinese Astrology… I have an overload of Rat energy.  In my ‘Four Pillars’,  three are Rats!  Geez, no wonder.  They’re very active those little Ratties.  They’re not ones to sit around on the couch all day, it makes them very nervous.  They like to do things.

‘I am the self-proclaimed aquisitor.  I am a link yet I function as a complete unit.  I aim at encompassing heights and strike my target, sure and steady.  Life is one joyous journey for me.  Each search must end with a new quest.  I am progress, exploration and insight.  I am the womb of activity.  I am the Rat’…. Theodora Lau

But things are changing… have changed.  I sit in a different place.  A journey that began, has taken me here.  Trusting myself so imperative now.  If I look to the past, I feel remorse, for all that’s no longer.  If I look to the future, I don’t know, what will be.  I only have now.  And now, I can no longer do what I once did.  I cannot be continually active.  My body has changed, is changing and will continue to change.  That’s why my focus is so important… I’m constantly creating my world.

I’m finding I just want to write… to take photos, to write books, make videos… there’s so much to communicate right now.  Maybe we’re being called, to stand and accept our dharma… do what only I can, you can, do.  We are unique.  The seven billion of us… unique.  I feel we are being called… to stand in our uniqueness… to use the skills and talents we were gifted with.  We came already with everything we need… we’ve just polished some things along the way.

We need to operate from Heart… from Love and Peace.  We need to be what we are…. Divinely created beings of Light and Love.  With a capacity to create miracles.  We all have within us the flame, the spark of the Divine.

The time is now.

No, it’s not always easy… when there’s so much movement, so many strong energies competing for our attention.  We’re living through a unique time… possibly one that’s not happened ever before.

The birthing of the Golden Age.

I need to be clear… I need to trust implicitly, my inner voice.  This journey is a big one… it wants all of me.

lotsa luv

marilynxxx

little marilyn at the ‘San’ …

Living with Post Polio

Something that came to me yesterday…  not words I normally use.  I like to focus on the Healing, not the disease.  In fact most of my time and focus is on healing…  especially these last three years.

I remember the end of 2012 (year before last now!!) after I had that nasty fall in the bus… I was in a lot of pain and discomfort… difficult with walking and doing daily chores.  It really did a number on my nervous system.  I embarked on a three-month intensive (having already been two years into a healing journey)… I was going to ‘heal myself of Post Polio’ … yes, a major undertaking.

The body, my body… is made from the materials of the Earth… and the wisdom from the Stars.  It’s a super amazing creation… constructed with divine intent.  It’s pretty awesome… so much more that we realize most of the time.

But it is made of Earth materials… and all Earth materials at some point recycle… we are all governed by the natural law, of death and rebirth.

My body was invaded by a nasty virus… it entered my body and affected its functioning.  The medical profession was taken by surprise; they really didn’t know how to respond to such attacks.  How to support the body’s natural healing ability.  We are still learning this.

This nasty virus came and affected many, mostly children were susceptible. It was called an epidemic.  The physical effects of the virus were clearly visible… children paralysed, on crutches… wearing leg irons.  The Polio generation.  Many children died.

I was told I was one of the lucky ones.  I remember the doctors ‘displaying’ me, as one of their ‘success’ stories.  I was paralysed, but I recovered… well with the help of a leg iron, I could walk.  Was it because I didn’t die or remain in an iron lung… that they called it a ‘success’?  I don’t know. I remained in hospital for a year… first in Camperdown Children’s Hospital, where I was first admitted (the contagious unit), then The San, the Sanitarium, for rehabilitation.

It was many years later that I discovered that The San was Sanitarium Health Food Products… which I purchased often in my early years.  The San was also known as a Health Resort, offering Hydrotherapy and Massage… this was 1951.  They also grew their own fruit and vegies… we had meals from the garden.  My early introduction to healthy living.

I don’t remember much from that time… memories are still buried deep.  A few glimpses I’ve had… like the ‘atmosphere’ of fear, children leaving their bodies… and at certain times I’ve heard these chilling screams.  But all the rest is locked away… it may return one day.

Its 2014, sixty three years have passed since that time.  I’m moving into later cycles.  I’ve had a life, like many, I guess… full of both beautiful moments and traumatic experiences, life on planet Earth.

I’ve been able to lead a relatively ‘normal’ life… ‘they’ would be proud of me.  That’s how we were instructed… ‘go out and be normal’.  You speak to anyone who personally encountered Polio… and they’ll remember the ‘normal’ word.  Well, I guess it was the 1950’s… the decade of being ‘normal’… it was marketed on every billboard.

So a lot of energy was placed… in being normal.  Looking back now, what a strain that was.  How can you have a normal body, when it’s not quite normal anymore?  Oh yes… the old mantra, just keep working, ignoring, don’t focus on any ailment… that makes you a good person, an upstanding citizen… denial on a massive scale.  Or was it just to appease the discomfort… people are not comfortable with any form of disease or disability.

I watched a doco on the Polio Epidemic in the US… they spoke about the fear, the intense fear that filled the streets, the towns and cities… the fear of Polio saturated the air.  Then they said… that the fear wasn’t about dying (as many did with the virus)… the fear was about disability, becoming disabled… this shocked me.

I’m very grateful that my major focus is on healing… well, I am a Virgo (The Healer), with a ‘Healer’ personality; I’ve had an interest in health since a very early age.  It’s been a major focus of mine… most of my life.

Love and compassion… for myself….

lotsa luv

marilynxxx

The energy around these last two days… has been strange, dark and heavy.  Haven’t felt that kind of presence around for a while.

It’s very obvious when its present… there’s no hiding it’s existence.  It’s vibration seems to permeate the surroundings.  That’s quite an influence, to cover such magickal beauty.  What is it?  Or was it?  Hoping it’s moved on, that it’s visit was short and swift.  But there’s still a ‘feeling’ in the air.  I don’t like that feeling… those heavy, dark clouds threatening to engulf.

What is it?  I asked many times.  What’s going on?  Is it inside me, around me… am I picking up something that is happening, somewhere on our planet?  Is it someone I know… the questions were many.  How can I make my way safely, through this sticky, malingering presence?  I do what I know best, to help me during times like these.

Patience… all passes on.  We are all living through such massive evolutionary times.  The death of an Age, the birthing of the new… so much energy swirling and moving creating death, rebirth and change.  None of us are immune.  It really helps to have something ‘real and true’ … the existence of my Love filled Heart… that beats within me.

I look to the skies… Astrology has been a part of my journey since I was quite young.  I ‘discovered’ it very early on in my life.  I search the screen on my computer… what relationships are the planets forming?  What can they tell me?

Looking to the usual suspects… but still nothing is really jumping out.  It alludes me for now.

Jupiter has just gone direct… a new potent burst of growth and expansion, pushing through the resistance.  Is that what I feel?  And with Mars retrograde in Libra… could be some resistance happening.

Mars in Libra… a place he’s sometimes uncomfortable, is in his two-year retrograde cycle.  And it’s a long one this time… influencing us all right up to July.  He’s being really slowed down.  Mars represents how we use our energy to move, to act… to get things done.  Our desire, our will, our need to conquer… our desire for action.  The emotion of anger, frustration.

A retrograde cycle turns the energy inward… a review of old territory, retrospection, re-connection with what has passed.  Striving to renew, revitalize, re-create.  Lot’s of ‘re’ going on.

Libra is known for her love of balance and harmony, right relations… but she’s a Cardinal sign.  Cardinals like to initiate, move, create… make happen.  She doesn’t sit at home fiddling her thumbs.

So Mars is very active… in his backward, retrospective movement.

I think we just all need to be a little patient during these times… with so many big energies swirling, changing, morphing… transforming our world.  It’s good to have an anchor during these times.  Something that makes your Heart sing… makes you feel really good.

Yes… I know the big guy Pluto is edging closer and closer to the natal placement of my Moon… and all in his own house… a double whammy of sorts.  Rebirth, renewal, transformation… those words have been appearing often lately.  A time of rebirth requires a lot of trust… a place to put your focus, and a place that is safe.  To ‘know’ what is real and true and good… will protect us during the storms of these rebirth years.

‘Cause it’s not just dying that’s going on… the most magnificent birthing is happening at the same time.

Yes… it’s all about focus, commitment and passion.

I trust… I am always protected, loved and nurtured.

At least these big, black clouds have brought some rain…. the earth is loving it.

And maybe I can turn to my body for some answers…  her ceaseless wisdom is never ending.

lotsa luv

marilynxxxxxx (extra’s for this time)

welcoming me home

Gentle rain is falling.  Mist and cloud cover the mountains;  adding a soft and alluring mystery to the forests.  Kookaburras are chortling, the earth drinks in the moisture, two lorikeets sit on the fence relishing the water that falls from the sky.   A lovely resting and healing day, provided for all.

It’s becoming fuller and stronger… you can now hear it fall onto the leaves, and branches… its wonderful tinkling sound, as it runs down the roof and into the gutters, filling the tanks…. ahhhh, rain, what a glorious sound…. what a blessing.  Thank you, thank you.

Water is now dripping from leaves, a large bush of cerese coloured Cosmo bow their heads in gratitude.  Life is a blessing… oh yes it is.

The Lorikeets still sitting, drinking in the moisture.  All is quiet and still, Life is celebrating… calling us back home.  The resident Butcher bird  sits on my lovely arch, her offspring (the one with the gorgeous singing voice) sits near by.  This Earth such a paradise… so much we’ve been given.  When we open our eyes… we see the miracle, sitting right in front of us.

In the wondrous sky above us the planets and stars reflect the activities and events here on Earth.  Everything reflects our current state.  In Astrological lore, the asteroid Chiron, who was discovered in our skies in 1977, sitting between Saturn and Uranus… carries a mighty message.  He represents the ‘wound’, our deepest, darkest, seemingly unreachable, unhealable wound…. and it’s healing.  The healing journey.  He’s the Shaman.

‘A major theme symbolised by the planet Chiron is the reconciliation and healing of the fundamental split between the spiritual and the instinctual in ourselves’

‘As early as 750BC, this split was already becoming institutionalized, as patriarchal social and religious forms replace their earlier matriarchal counterparts.  Before this time, in the areas now comprising Europe and the Near East, the Great Mother was worshipped in a multitude of different forms.  Being synonymous with fertility and the instinctual life, the suppression of her worship meant the feminine in general became devalued.’   Melanie Reinhart… ‘Chiron and the Healing Journey’

Chiron is currently sitting with our Sun and recently sat with our Moon.  His energy radiated through our Luminaries… his energy is being felt by all.  We can only heal ourself.  It all begins within.  The greatest thing we can do, is heal… and find that place of rest and solitude within ourselves.

Yes… it’s 2014, we’re all living through the last days, not of the Earth (even though these threats are there)… but of a time, an era… an Age.  And it’s not pretty.  Our sensitive receptors are finding it difficult.  But we must have faith… in ourselves.  We must know the truth… that Life is Love, kindness and care.  That we live in a paradise unparalleled… that we are gifted with each and every breath.

Yes it’s a serious time… a time for seriously becoming real… true to the calling of our Heart.  We are all divinely created human beings… gifted with so much.  Time to be who we really are.

Trust in the healing… it’s happening all the time.  I always remember my dear Dad’s wisdom… ‘there’s no such thing as a coincidence’.  Everything is bringing a message.  Whilst we’re alive, we have the potential to do anything… anything at all.  We can bring Peace to this Earth… of this, I have total faith.

Enjoy your breath.

lotsa luv…. marilynxxx

Inviting the Rain gods….

It’s another day, so quiet and still… in this sacred land that protects and nourishes both my body and soul.  So gentle the sounds,  you can feel the quietness caress your skin.  So much love exists.  The Mother’s presence is visceral and real.  Life is all around, celebrating and giving thanks.

Cool air, tingles and refreshes… these long, hot, dry summer days have taken their toll.  The Butcher bird serenades, the Kooka’s, Noisy Miners, Native Pigeons, Blue Honeyeaters, Wagtails and all the rest whose names I sometimes forget!

Native Pigeons… one of their favourite spots…

Ahhhh…. such an exciting moment just happened, my heart is singing…. my dear friends Missy, Bubs and Mumma came for a visit… I haven’t seen them for a while, I really love my friends.  Missy, Bubs and Mumma are my neighbours pets, they’re cow people and they were here on ‘my’ property for ages… Missy is Gemma’s (my dear departed friend) bub.  The three of them have always been a family, I get so excited when I see them… I really love them.

Missy and Bub were the first to arrive at the back fence…

I had to let them out of the paddock,  the electric fence had been broken, by some of those hungry mouths.  I’m growing some trees over in the paddock, the electric fence protects them.  The power is supplied by a Solar Panel… the battery needed replacing, that’s why it wasn’t ‘zinging’.  I  have a new battery now… so hopefully my friends can come and stay again… I miss them.

then Mumma… next Lucerne and nom, nom, nom…

So they (the three amigo’s) have been roaming the paddocks with the big herd of cows… I’m sure there’s a new little bub growing inside Mumma’s tummy… I’ve seen Mr Bull following passionately.  Mr Bull is never shy… he knows what he wants… and after it he goes.  Well thanks to him… we have all these little bubs around.  Mr Bull is very entertaining to watch… he certainly appears to be strongly focused on what he’s here for….  such a passionate suitor.

So an expected joy… this morning, seeing my loving friends again.  I gave them some more Lucerne, they’re still munching away.  That such things can fill your heart with love and joy…. aint Life grand.

Have a beautiful day….

lotsa luv

marilynxxx

(and to the tiniest… this little wee spider has been keeping me company the whole time I’ve been writing… investigating my camera, the keyboard and now the side of the computer…. Life is a miracle )