How to find a language… for those formless places. Not quite here… but present all the same.
Feelings… I know them well.
It’s keeping mind away from them… is the trick.
So much swirling around. I often say if we had special glasses (like 3D glasses ~ only probably 5D at least would be required)…
so we could see the movement of all that formless invisible matter… dancing in our space. Passing through our energy fields into our physical.
I got to know these formless critters when training in Pranic Healing. I mean, words like ‘entities’ were even hard for me to take in. And I’m pretty open (too much unfortunately… but that’s another thing).
We were practicing… during my training; offering sessions for a donation, in the local community. My first ‘public’ experience… extending my skills, practising what I learned.
It was during one of those… that a hand grasped me by the throat. And pressed tight. It was real alright… I was feeling it. But of course on the physical level nothing could be seen.
I’d encountered an ‘entity’ ~ the ones my teacher had spoken of. God… they’re real.
Of course my teacher brushed it off… I recall him saying ‘it’s just your ego..’ whatever that meant. He wasn’t disregarding the fact an ‘entity’ had latched itself onto me. So whatever the ‘ego’ thing meant… I had no idea.
I’ve encountered these formless forms… many times over the years of my practice. I could feel them… and see them. Some big buggers there were. Nasty bits.
I reasoned… that it was all just energy. Too much thinking and analysing doesn’t help.
Why entities are on my mind I’m not sure. Maybe it was my first Pranic session in years that activated the whole thing again.
I’m energy sensitive… ridiculously so at times. It’s not always comfortable. But I can’t change it. I’ve learned (very slowly) to trust myself more and more… as my life’s unfolded.
I’m feeling a lot at present. July’s been a big month planetary wise. These last 18mths have been a bit of a head spinner. This year I reckon more than last.
I’ve been wanting to hermit. Lie on my bed and read novels. The world outside is way too much at times… so much going on. At least under the surface.
So much unexpressed emotion.
So much confusion, uncertainty, isolation.
I get the sense it’s going to get worse before it gets better… whatever that means. We haven’t even encountered the drastic weather changes yet. Our precious Earth is struggling to breath… like I am with my mask. Our lungs full of grief.
It’s a funny thing with emotions … they tend to activate any that are similar… stored away. They go exploring through the halls of the akashic beaming up all the resonant bits.
And yeah Mother Moon’s in Scorpio at present. Scorpio goes deep. He’s an edge dweller. Lives on the edge of nice and good. Hungers for the raw and unpolished.
Lusts after unity. True intimacy and authenticity. Strips us to our vulnerability. Purges anything past its used by date.
Not always for the faint of heart… but worth the journey.
Where can we strip another layer of ‘false’… to get to the true core of everything. After eons of make-belief.
Breathing is good. And I’m sure glad I’m alive… regardless how tender it gets at times.
Allowing the magick to approach… swarm you, absorb you, eat you up… swallow you whole.
Divine presence, limitless inspiration… awe that stops worlds. Sets your entire being at peace.
That ‘God’ is all around us… is never to be doubted.
We are not sinners… we are divine and perfect beings… created in the image of the whole.
I almost didn’t go down… for dawn that is.
Yesterday in the big smoke… ‘checked in’ to 13 places; mask on an off. Slipped down over my nose at times (so I could breath).
The Pranic helped. My first session in years. I’m also a ‘Pranic Healer’… it was the first modality that called me. I remember it well… the day I first met my teacher.
I was recovering… but still deeply in it. The ‘adjustment disorder’ (fancy name for nervous breakdown) the doctor informed me I had entered into.
I burnt out.
At the speed I use to go it’s not surprising.
Add to that the legacy I’ve carried from the Virus visit back when I was three. It’s walked with me since.
Some say a virus never leaves… lodges itself in your body. It gets attached… doesn’t want to leave you.
Way back… when studies were done on the Polio virus… they discovered during autopsy’s that the virus was still alive in various places in the body. Spinal chord and large intestine in particular.
Recently I read a comment someone made about the current virus. She said her father had Polio… and I guess was using that as a backing for her current discussion.
I immediately responded… inside myself.
I don’t regret anything. Well almost😶. I don’t regret having the virus… I figure it was part of my journey. Sure it changed the direction of my life. But me being me… I used that as an adventure. A quest… to get to the bottom of it all.
Being exposed to life and death… isolation (years in hospital) and the medical system… my three year old curiosity (even amidst it all) was ignited.
That curiosity I still have… I’m still on the trail. Still trying to find the ‘truth’ behind it all.
I wouldn’t be who I am, what I’ve experienced, and what I’ve pursued… if that virus didn’t choose me.
This in no way has anything to do with now. I try to stay out of it. It’s a trigger sensitive issue… and it doesn’t take much to ignite.
I hope we all move beyond that. I really do. My whole life has been about ‘caring’. No-one can take my life experience away from me.
I’ve lived it. I know it. I’ve seen it. It’s created the foundation of my being.
So let’s stay civilised… kind and caring.
Not letting our beliefs… no matter how foundational they are… ever get in the way of love.
Otherwise we are doomed.
It’s a huge time… astrologers and ‘Seers’ have warned us for many years. I too have ‘seen’… a long time ago. I’ve written about it for years.
The visions were clear.
A huge change was upon us… we had to clean up the mess. The mess we’ve all created. We’re all in this together.
If you can… find a way to give expression to your emotions. Feel the grief… the loss. It’s real. I know I’ve carried heaps of grief in my lungs.
We carry on on the surface… yet underneath is this tsunami of raging emotions… fear, loss, grief, anger. All bubbling ready to spill over.
They need release… and not at each other.
Taking responsibility for what we feel… what triggers us. Yeah sometimes we fail… but we can pick ourself up and try again.
We’re all learning.
This is a new world.
The old is gone.
It won’t come back
It’s likely to become more intense over the shorter time period.
We won’t change unless we’re forced. That’s proved itself.
So the ‘war’ has begun… where do we find shelter.
The old has gone… allow time for grieving.
It’s not coming back.
Yeah… sometimes the anger surfaces in me, but I’m so used to stuffing it down… morphing then into depression…. heaviness and sorrow.
Yeah… angry at ‘those’ and we know there are some… those that have brought us to this brink. They need to burn in hell.
And yes… at the same time… we all need to take responsibility for where we are.
It’s a weird weird world for sure.
Much love to you ❤️🧚♀️❤️
and ps… as I got the first glimpse of that indescribable golden ball peeking over the water’s edge… my entire body was flooded with the most extraordinary sensations… like a surge of effervescent light rays cleansing all parts of me.
I promised myself a month… had slithering doubts whether I’d make it. I was hoping I could. I mean… not that it’s a monstrous task.
Memories fade. Yet some of them remain crystal clear. How is that? Who decides? Who chooses what stays at the front of the line?
The memory I was trying to pull back ~ was how I felt, as I did the last bits, gathered them all and sent them off.
The end of four years.
Saying that took me right back… that late day on the beach… only been here (back in the area) about 3 weeks. Had no intention of returning. Was just looking for affordable accommodation.
Next step on my road out of Mahalia (the Sacred Site I lived for 7 years).
So three weeks… I was just settling in. Takes a while. Mind moves fast, body moves slow.
I was on the beach… it was getting cold. Day was diminishing, dusk coming soon. Sky was pregnant with heavy weighty clouds… dark as night.
Will there be a chance… to catch a glimpse?
I was willing to wait and see.
Hours it was… as I sat and observed. Couples walking hand in hand. Kids running, playing in the sand. Lone walkers contemplating life… breathing in the magick air.
Surfers… communing with their beloved.
People swimming… having a dip. Jumping in the waves.
I sat and observed.
The hours kept chugging on… it was getting cold.
I wasn’t going to leave… till I caught at least a glimpse.
It’d been a very long time… since I had the chance to watch Moon rise out of the ocean.
It was the Virgo Full Moon… and she sat right on my Sun.
I sensed, as often is the way with me… that this Full Moon was significant. And I needed to be there to welcome her.
Hours built on hours… was almost tempted to leave.
Sky was black…
is there even a crack… that she’ll be able to slip through?
Almost at the point of standing… taking my cold body back to my lodgings…
she appeared
in all her majesty
Black clouds or no… she’s never diminished
We got to commune.
But it was during that time… those hours on the beach
sitting waiting…
observing
watching the interaction
of humans and the ocean
I began to feel.
It came on suddenly
hadn’t beckoned it
Fukushima
filled my mind.
Where did that come from?
Rarely ever give it a thought
I felt the fear… the anguish and the dread
like melted steel
pooled in my gut
It took a life…
overwhelmed the surrounds
I looked at the people
all of them… so many
I looked to the ocean
all the creatures in there
the whales and the dolphins
and all the rest… we rarely, if ever see
the combination of the two… was unthinkable
a catastrophe of unimaginable proportions
‘NO!’ it can’t happen
Then it came… from the pit of my soul
well… that’s what it felt like
I made a request… of the Goddess
Illuminated there in this Virgo Full Moon
‘Can you give me an answer… to heal the oceans?’
In my innocent awareness… I pleaded.
Of course I forgot… that day/night drifted from the top of my mind
I got on with living
being in a new place
But Life didn’t forget
Oh no… not that kind of request
It unfolded
It has a story
Four years forward… I took the road that opened
How will it all translate
create an outcome
we’ll just have to wait and see.
Three weeks ago… that memory I was trying to conjure
how I felt
as I finally sent off the last of my training
Four years… from way back then to now
As I pressed ‘send’
I promised myself I’d take one month off
I was exhausted
Well… there’s one week left.
I’m surprised
I did it.
Wonder what’s next.
Ahhhh Life… by the courtesy of Breath.
Hope your day is magickal… if not, make it that way
This Solstice crossing has been a big one. The biggest I think I remember feeling. The day itself… Monday here, felt magickal. There was this personal visceral sense that vibrated in my body. It felt incredibly special.
I replied to a friend ‘Yes I’m feeling it. So rich, still and present. I feel the spaciousness… this wholeness. All of me.’
My friend Kate had written… ‘this is a time where the celestial cycles draw you closer into your centre… with an invitation to examine what you truly hold in your heart.’ Kate Rydge
I knew what she was saying… it was happening inside me.
I felt like I wanted to stop everything… just immerse in this feeling, these sensations.
The day unfolded.
The days following that special Solstice Crossing… that immersion into a brand new invitation, a peek at where we’re heading… what’s waiting for us…. have been somewhat combobulating.
I’ve heard enough to see it’s not just me… so many have been feeling this energetic presence these last few days. This last week.
For me… I felt exhausted. I mean, even more than before. Like the energy sucked out of me. And a kind of tension pushing in from the sides.
Didn’t have the energy to even try diagnosing it… trying to analyse or give it some meaning.
Trusting the process… allowing the space for all to be. To become, to remove, to continue… to the next frontier.
Yesterday waiting for my friend to arrive… I almost cancelled. My tank felt empty. I had little to give. But by the time I considered it felt too late to pull the plug… so decided to come as I am. No frills or pretence.
Or cleaning the house before😃😃 (YaY… there’s been growth🎉🎉)
Lying horizontal… feet elevated on the cushion, my head sinking in another… I grabbed my journal and pen.
I scribbled… in a big and generous script…
‘I have nothing to sell – but I have everything to become
I’m alone, stationary, still – but I’m connected, surrounded… empty and full both at the same time
I wander – yet I’m always found. I’m unique and I’m the same
I’m separate and joined
I’m ecstatic, I’m sad
I’m still – stopped – fast and moving
I’m a whole host of things
That are finite yet infinite
I know – yet I’m ignorant
I have so much – I know so little
I walk, I crawl. I distinguish – I forget
I’m forever – I’m now
I will be – I am
I’m never and more
I’m complete. I’m whole
I’m empty
I’m so many things ~
All rolled up ~ in one glitter ball
Life is forever and gone
always never
was – is and will be
wasn’t isn’t and never will be
It’s a . . . . . . . ~ that’s for sure (forgot the word😃)
Wandering – jumping – leaping – strolling
forgetting
……. And remembering again’.
Hope you have a lovely day… being you like never before ❤️🌷❤️
I made it… down for dawn. How’s it possible that each and every day begins so totally new? Never a repeat. Something brand new approaching you… each time you show up. Each time you say ‘Yes…. I’m game to have a go😃’.
Space ~ god where can I find the words. It’s such an exotic, sublime, totally absorbing… and familiar place. I’m so drawn to it.
Yeah… could ‘explain’ a bit through astrology… an ancient science been walking with me since I was eleven.
The demander of Freedom… a care-less existence, free to reach the heights s/he sees, never surrenders to being small and held and limited. Uranus of course. Ruler of Aquarius… the great Freedom Fighter, Liberation Rebel.
So yes his placement in my birth chart (all very mathematical, Geometrical and mysterious)… the Universe ~ a Master Professor. Blows my mind.
Suffice to say his presence in my personally created energetic matrix … gives a longing, a desire to live within that boundary-less world. Well… Neptune helps with that as well.
I woke early. About five. Mid-winter here (only just past the Winter Solstice)… so Sun doesn’t surface till later. 6.38am today.
It was dark… but I could still see heavy dark clouds above. Rain was about. It wouldn’t be one of those cloudless wonders… awe inspiring miracles… Sun dominating the sky with no interference. Proclaiming his royalty… King of our Solar System. That’s gotta be one of the most magickal sights.
It wasn’t one of those mornings. I rode my trusty rusty bike along the river, over the footbridge, across to the dunes and parked my trusted friend beside a tree…. set there to wait for me. Then that special walk down the long thin track, bush on either side. Damp sand under my feet. Morning stirring… no light yet. Birds rustling, life getting ready to announce.
Up ahead this slash of red. My heart lifted… let out an excited sigh. There’ll be colour after all.
I love that silent walk in the dark… surrounded by trees, life beginning to stir, feet and toes squelching in the sand. Rugged up for winter… breathing in ocean air. I mean… seriously. How lucky can we be?
Yep sky was packed with dark and heavy clouds… but that slash of orange and red… and then the deep inhales of morning fresh ocean air.
The slash of red reflected discreetly on the waves… as they came to kiss the shore. Tide moving away… back out home. They’ll return again later today. They never go far, never leave completely. Each and every day… like this incredible swing holding and caressing us.
I walked for quite a distance. I stopped doing that a while back. The scars I carry from my meeting with the virus… when I was only small, left their mark.
I’ve walked miles and miles… in my time. Always loved that sense of freedom and space when you’re walking… as if the wholeness opens all around you. Brushing past your face.
I’d hunt out bush areas… wherever I lived. I’d always find one. Off I’d trek, immersing myself in their nurturing.
But I walked a long way this morning… walked half way to Byron. The ocean on one side… the nature reserve on the other… the long stretch of sand in front and behind. I was the first one down this morning.
There weren’t many walkers this morning… black heavy clouds threatening… you could see the rain falling on the horizon. There were only a few. One even went in for a swim.
This Space thing. God how could I ever explain it. Find words to come close. This sense of expansiveness. This place of no walls. This endless being… this place so familiar. It’s the most comfortable I feel. It’s like my home.
We meet each other… but there’s no form to interrupt. Nothing gets in the way. It’s so safe. It’s nothing but it’s everything. It’s pure and sacred yet so simple and real.
It’s present. It’s full. It’s intoxicating. It’s enthralling. It sees me, I see it. We merge. We are one yet separate just the same.
It’s coming home. It’s perfect. I want it to be forever. I don’t want to leave it.
So I walked and walked and breathed it all in. What a miracle. They’re happening all the time and we just don’t see them.
Half way back… the gentle rain began… soaking my hair, dribbling down my face. Dampening my coat.
I looked up to the crowded sky… I smiled, I received the blessings of rain.
Still a few keen walkers kept on in their shorts and teeshirts.
I reached my max with walking… time to return to camp. My cute little cabin in the holiday park. Who would’ve thought!
But that could be all about to change.
Leaving behind all the majesty. All the perfection. The newly discovered each and every day. The beauty… ahhh the beauty.
I remind myself it’s everywhere. It’s never not been where I am.
I missed the dawn this morning… had a long much needed sleep. Up just in time to watch the golden glow from my window. I had planned to go… but sleep was good.
It’s hard to know what’s what… what’s the ’cause’, the stimulation that’s provoking a response in you.
There’s the weather, the seasonal cycles, the environment, the community you’re surrounded by. The wifi interference, your own biorhythms. Your daily habits and actions… the food you eat. The substances you consume. What you open yourself to. The outside world you take in. The collective vibe… where we are as a multitude of species living here on Earth. The galactic contribution. The constant movement, interaction and relationship with everything.
Governments, rules and regulations, authority, the maze of things crowding us, bidding for our attention. Stealing bites… bit by bit.
There’s our memories, our current problems. There’s life and death going on around us all the time. There’s lies, there’s promises, there’s cons and deceptions. There’s a whole lot of stuff.
There’s what appears like insanity… bizarreness in extreme. There’s a whole soup of things. There’s Barnaby Joyce… there’s Telstra. Oops 🙈🙉🙊 There’s the whole circus there.
But strangely… very strangely for me, I feel detached.
I just shake my head… how bizarre can it get? Seems there’s no limit.
Oh yeah… there’s the Virus thing.
Detachment was never one of my strong points. I’m a merger. My energetic boundaries are super porous. I’m a feeler. It’s hard to separate me from everything. I don’t feel walls… there’s just open space. No walls out there.
Yes overwhelm’s a thing…. why I spend so much time alone.
Detachment I used to covet. Friends with Moon in Aquarius (for example)… enchanted me. The distance so natural for them, the emotional detachment… fascinating to observe.
It’s a more recent thing… this sense of detachment. Probably a part of the whole unfolding and shifts within me. Giving time and space for processing and integration. I’ve recently experienced integration at a whole new level.
I know I’m lucky to have lazy days. I feel grateful for the way I’ve structured my life.
I’ve done things… lots of things. Created things, built things, studied things, achieved things… improved things. Made things beautiful. I’ve contributed, I’ve shared. I’ve had a go. I’ve kept turning up. I’ve taken risks. I’ve stepped close to the edge. I’ve accomplished. I’ve committed to following my inner voice… she’s never lead me astray. She has such an alluring presence.
I’ve learned to trust… it’s taken a lifetime. I trust the magick I see and hear. I’m led internally. I guess that’s natural for an intuitive… but I’ve been willing, I’ve surrendered. I’ve let go… I’ve trusted the generosity. I’ve walked away from ‘having it all’… honouring the call. I trusted the Force… that invisible direction that’s always whispering. Sometimes insisting.
And I’ve done it all for most of my life. I’m proud of myself for that.
Feels like an ocean of movement currently happening… yet encased within this swirling mass of energetic presence is stillness. Moving deeper into its core.
It’s Winter here in the Southern Hemisphere… perfect time for returning to the cave. Warming yourself by the fire. Allowing the dark to nourish you… time for renewal. Creating space for the seeds of new life. Allowing time… having patience. Trusting the process.
Letting go of striving. Releasing the emergency… I’m grateful for just a taste of it. I’m super grateful for letting go even just a bit.
I felt heavy… sitting in my usual place, my favourite orange stool. So much time been spent with ‘her’ pen in hand, hands on keys. As the years keep slipping by. Where do they go?
Dreams again… of a different sort filled my sleep.
No traumatic scenes… but a niggling sense, of not being good enough. Not really part of the team.
The heaviness was in a different field… these were watery, sluggish, weighty, voluminous. Felt like muddy patches being scraped off rocks, piles of stuff lifted from their settled place.
There’s movement… a lot of it. Seems even more when you stop.
We’re used to running… seems faster as the years move past. Our world gets speedier, more to accomplish. More robbing our time. More thieving from us.
We continue running around the wheel. Like rats in a laboratory.
Going where? Still in a cage.
Got a bit detoured there… my mind can take me lots of places.
It’s an unravelling. A washing away. Their hold has been loosened, they’re not hanging on so tight.
They’ve prepared themselves… they heard the gong… they knew it was coming. Time to go. Time to let go… time always arrives.
So the darkness, the heaviness… weighting one of my fields. It’s not the physical… that’s clear to see. Even thou left unchecked it can quickly move over to that.
It’s in my emotional field.
God knows how long some of that’s been there.
I get visions of times way past.
We look around and here we are… yes that’s true. Yet dig a little deeper… and you’ll find, you’re in lots of places. All at the one time.
What’s been created is never destroyed… it just sits in there. Finds itself a place to rest. Overtime it calcifies. Becomes a part of everything.
Then the digging starts… man, are you sure you want to do this?
You never know what you’ll find. Can have no idea what’s hidden under there.
Yeah… body won’t go back… it’s stuck in now. But other parts of you can. And they do.
So there’s a whole lot of releasing happening inside… can almost see it floating away.
It’s dark, it’s gloomy… deep dark places. Globs of substance ready to depart.
You think our machines are complex? Man ~ they’re nothing compared to the human body. That’s a miracle, a mind-blasting piece of genius.
And one lifetime is just not long enough… to really get the gist of it.
Day 6 of Stop… who would’ve known it had so much activity.
And it’s Winter Solstice… said to be the most Feminine time of the year. It’s the time of Dark. The fertility and magick of the Sacred Womb.
The crossing the river into new lands. The leaving behind. The courage to find. The pull of the light… takes you across. Magick worlds are beckoning you.
Crossing the river… while standing still.
The darkness of death… followed by rebirth.
Wishing you the most Sacred Solstice… we’d have no life on Earth without Sun.
Day five… of ‘stopping’. Yesterday I rarely left my bed. The tiredness descended… felt super heavy. Hard to keep my eyelids lifted. And it was such a gorgeous day… those perfect winter days here in the north (NSW OZ). Maximum 20… the breeze still carrying the chill from the snowfields. The Sun deliciously warm. Sky ~ our perfect Ozzie Blue.
But I needed to be horizontal on my bed. I viewed it all from my generous bay window.
There’s a bit happening in the galactic field… our planetary neighbours. Sun slowing down preparing to ‘reverse’… head up north. Winter Solstice tomorrow. These next few days while Moon moods in sexy deep magnetic Scorpio… there’s an increase in planetary activity.
Jupiter ~ great Zeus, King of the Gods… Neptune ~ Magickal Mystery Tour guide… and our dear familiar heady trickster friend Mercury all changing direction.
Nothing moves or changes in isolation.
Feels like things are unravelling. Things inside me. My focus has become more internal, insular. As I am, thus is my world.
Night before last… delivering me into that super heavy exhausted space yesterday… I had a strange dream. I was witnessing a traumatic event… a woman and her baby being hunted by a predatory male.
But there was some distance… my body wasn’t activated, experiencing all the emotions. It was as if I was witnessing it. It was close, but not directly impacting me.
I’d wake from time to time during the dream. When I did there was this strange sense of detachment from what I’d witnessed. My body wasn’t sounding the alarm… activating my flight and fight. The hormonal chemicals weren’t surging through my body. And there was the strangest sense of ticking something off. Ticking a box.
I’d go back to sleep and return to the dream.
The dream didn’t grab me and make me a part of it… didn’t activate my organs, send alarm signals in my brain. When I woke and finally got up I just felt exhausted. Super heavy. Hence the whole day in bed.
I tried figuring it out… with the limited mental energy available. It was a mystery at first. I just didn’t get it… yet it felt significant. As it settled more… I saw something more clearly.
I’d spent the last five weeks… ticking off boxes (finishing my Tantra Major).
I’d been doing tons of practices, heaps of couple coaching… and ticking off boxes.
The dream… the traumatic event I witnessed, the woman and her baby, the predator… witnessed yet from a distance. This was something rising up from inside me.
I don’t need to know where. Or who. Or How. Like bubbles releasing, matter unfolding, energetic masses dispersing… you get a glimpse of them as they materialise for just a second. Before they head off to reunite back to energy source.
We carry a lot inside us. Maybe that’s why we like to keep busy. You know how it feels when you stop. Stopping for just a few minutes. I feel it each time I sit down to do yoga. It comes rising up…. whatever I’m feeling underneath it all. It’s often surprising.
Giving the space to unravel. Allowing time to wind down. Allowing the process to do what it needs to do. Allowing the integration… creating space for the new to rise.
Life’s a magickal thing… it really is. And way more multi-dimensional that we ever consider.
Down at dawn this morning… I remember as I often do… the day Ocean came up to my front door… and the journey that flowed from that. I watched it as it slid smoothly over the tops of the mountains. In front of my open front door it stood… beckoning me, instructing me to come.
Five years… and significant years they’ve been. They always are. But these last five years for me have taken me closer into my Crone years. A whole new chapter.
It was the Spirit of Ocean of course… not the water itself. That’s how it is being me… I see energy. I’m trained in it…. but it’s also a natural gift. An inherited trait.
Seeing energy as if it’s taken a form is possible. It happens. We’re young in our collective evolution… and the use and awareness of our natural abilities as a human being.
I’ve had a lifetime of learning about trusting… I wasn’t a willing student. As I’ve often shared… I called myself ‘Doubting Thomas’ for years. I had heightened senses… saw and heard things that made no sense in the ‘real world’. How do you explain them? How are they possible?
My therapist/psychologist gave a pyschologist’s explanation… really helped my left brain settle. ‘Analytic personalities are often clairaudient and clairvoyant’ she said. Well… I sighed, it’s normal.
Ocean called I came… it’s four and a half years… nearly five by the time I leave here.
Why was I called? Not sure I’ll ever know the depths of it. Be able to put it away in a neatly filed box.
I’m not who I was when I came… I’m five years older. I’ve shifted. I’ve changed. I’ve come home more to myself.
I took the Tantra journey. I went back, relived things. I went to the familiar edge… my body struggled dealing with it all. I studied, I committed, I showed up day after day after day. Did thousands of practices. Well it felt like that.
I bought my first sex toys. A requirement for our training😃.
I learned to love myself more.
I slowed down even more.
I read heaps of novels… I watched lots of series on Iview and SBS.
I rode my bike to magickal places. Brunswick Heads has a lot of them. Of course they’re everywhere.
Winding down… feeling it all. Giving space… and Time (my precious time)… to honour the process. New life evolving.
I was willing… I love that about myself. I’m quietly driven… for myself. For my internal evolution, my internal truth. I’m committed. I’m curious… I keep going. I’m hungry for life.
The Healing Journey is a big part of me. I started early. It’s been a major focus.
I’m not keen on the spotlight… don’t like bright lights… I luv my cave. I rest in solitude… feeling a part of everything. Communing with Life… feeling its majesty… it’s closeness, it’s intimacy. It’s never ceasing love and care.
One life is short. Not enough to understand and meet it all. We have the time we do… to get on with it. Precious moments that keep slipping by.
So many distractions… so much mediocrity. So much blah blah.
Underneath… the magnificence. The bounty. The treasure.
Tomorrow (down here) we say bye bye to Sun for a while… as he focuses his radiant strength on our friends up north. We settle in by the fire… ponder, remember, slow down. Digest all that’s past.
Our peak times of activity are moving away… for us southern folk. We’re being welcomed into the bosom of our cave. Our cave… our sacred space.
Life activity continues… especially in our modern worlds… while the cycles of life continue their rhythm. Repeating… yet never being the same.
It feels magickal to be in flow… really feel a part of it.
Day five… looking like another on my bed. My body feels weighty. Going to have to cancel that invitation… don’t have energy to spare, to share with others.
Marilyn’s Magick🌺 