Big new step… 🐝🐝

I’ve been feeling the restlessness… the name I give it… this agitation (or is readiness) to move forward.

Jeez… what a time it’s been. Those big ones are big when they’re happening… the resonance of which is often with you for a while. Then they move to the background a bit… the present flooding in.

I just remember what was being asked of me was hard… too hard. I’ll hopefully learn from that… one of my core values is never endangering myself.

I am way too precious.

And my life… is the most precious thing to me. And it’s not for sale… or bartering. It’s my sacred duty to learn the highest standards of love and care.

We’ve become very sloppy in this world we’ve created.

Man… is it due for an overhaul.

It’s been hot… hot right now. I remember this happening in March (here in Oz)… as March is traditionally first month of Autumn. I remember it often happening at this time… Summer coming on strong, reminding us that she’s not gone yet.

But who knows what the future holds.

I was thinking more extremes… then I thought of us, humans… and how we are on our home planet Earth… yes, extreme. Always wanting more.

The systems created by some of us… foster and encourage this toxic mindset.

Things are in flux.

I’ve been feeling that… viscerally in my body… things are shaking. Things are going to fall.

But we’re alive🐸🐝🐸

The big step this morning… I’d been craving an immersion in the glorious ocean. And it’s been so hot. This morning… my soft plan late yesterday… I would drive early down for a swim.

And I did😊

I have her still on my body😊

That was my first drive in over 3 weeks. Since the slip/fall (significantly injuring my knee)…

My tail bone area feels bruised from all the sitting/lying I’ve done.

I’ve been feeling myself ‘come back’… these last few days.

Then I thought ‘the shock’… I had moved out of it. I hadn’t thought of the shock component of the fall.

It activated so much. I’m pretty amazing… I have the power and gift of regeneration… but these last few months knocked me down.

But I get to do and focus on my favourite thing… Healing. I know it well.

Ooohh… potent time at present…moving into Dark of Moon. Always a Sacred Seeding.

And our Sun in balance… the powerful Autumn Equinox.

Pluto ready to step into Aquarius.

Being grounded in our precious Earth is good🌏

Happy and generous times… 🌺❤️🌺

Ps… As well as driving… taking myself somewhere by myself… I went to the beach by myself…

walked on the sand… soft and hard… went into the ocean. The ocean floor was heavily undulated. I didn’t go out far… played in the shallows… how wonderful it always is.

Another celebration for my knee… to navigate undulating ground while navigating the waves.

I’ve been fully trusting myself… I’m so much stronger in that. It’s so nice… she’s actually quite sensible and grounded🌺🌺

the waves of change… 🐯🐯

I feel like I’m hungry for rest. Warmth, harmony, kindness and being with what is.

Being here now.

‘What is it that you’re feeling?’ I’m invited to investigate. Sometimes they seem illusive… those feelings… a blend of many. What is the prevailing emotion leading this moment? As it influences everything… specially in our body.

A thank you to Kasia🌺

It’s three weeks into my new reality. I drift back to me living in the cabin… I’m different. I see that clearly. I’m different now. It’s a feeling through my body.

A lots happened these last few months… living a new way… being new… within the constant changing.

Settling further and further into my most comfy self. At home in my being. Seeking me out.

Another thank you to Shelby🌺

Seeing my strength… my increased capacity… settled within the fragile vulnerability.

I’ve reason to be proud of me… I’ve taken great care of myself. Even when I didn’t… I was learning how to.

The ‘fall’ has been a big one… on the end of the other ones… selling/packing/moving and the virus.

I sense the fall hit down to some still deeply buried trauma remains. My journey with the other virus how it focused and sculptured my life.

I got to live all my learning. Get first hand tuition… all fed into this innocent, pure, developing brain. I had just turned three.

No one could possibly understand just how that activates inside me… it was my journey, my teaching.

Three weeks is not long in the healing of a significant injury… but still enough to experience the wonders of the human body.

And the very direct part I play in my healing.

There is so much power around us… in the natural world and within our self. We’ve just had to remember to truly love our self.

Step by step. Being aware of where I am… in every moment… am I settled in myself. Or someone/something else. In charge of myself. Living this amazing opportunity… continuing to expand and explore.

Offering my thanks… for everything.

We can trust life… we can trust our self.

With Love💗🐸💗

It’s day 18… half way between 2 and 3 weeks…

I’m healing.

Healing’s been a major part of my life… since very early. We’re amazing… us human beings.

As are all the other gorgeous residents of Mother Earth… perfectly made.

2023 certainly came in with a force… invisible, yes… but nothing reduced her intensity. She had a job to do… and she was on to it. It’s important times.

I’m not in a clear enough space, to replay it all… I’m still immersed in the process. I’ve had a lot come at once. And I’m sitting here, relatively at peace with myself… (typing with one finger on my phone… my Mac died☹️).

I’m alive… happy and content. I have so much in my life.

And all my wondrous guides and helpers… in all the realms… bring me to the most luscious places… placed in the womb of her.

The power of the Healing Journey… it’s like surrendering to Life and Love.

Much Love💗🌺💗

My column in the Nimbin Good Times… hot off the press March edition… page 35

Movers Eve… 🧑🏻‍🦳🧡

Full tide in Simpson’s Creek

I’ve dilly dallied a bit this morning… this last day before movers come… and make my cabin empty.

Extra two days and I’ll be gone from here. One day/time I’ll be gone from the Earth. I will miss her. What an extraordinary opportunity to be here. And witness all we do.

Knowing we are only here for a visit… a short precious time to take in as much as we can. We hunger for the experience of Life.

Our passion is never satiated… it calls us constantly. It’s a laviously greedy lover.

I was thinking… more feeling, that I can’t quite believe I’m here and now. I mean one day out from movers arriving.

What a f**king journey it’s been. During it I said often… ‘I can’t do this…’ It felt way beyond my capacity.

It’s hard to find words for it… the depth and intensity… that f**king virus… an evil beast. But there’s no point getting angry… my gentle heart most definitely doesn’t need that. And that was the last three years. This is a new time.

Challenging yes… of course. It’s stretching you, demanding you move… to higher ground. Expansion is a requisite of these current times.

Stagnation is death. Life demands renewal. Everything keeps moving… striving for ultimate union… and the sheer joy of just being.

Full tide in Simpson’s Creek is magnificent once again. I’ve been in… immersed myself in her powerful magick. Let the Sacred Mangroves serenade my longing. My most favourite Cicarda’s 😊😊

I think the ties have been untangled… I won’t say cut… that’s too bloody. But there sure is some weeping inside. My tender porous heart.

I’m in a waiting station… Still busy with tidying up the old, creating a space to move forward. Into the void.

The place of endless opportunities… perfect in this potent Pisces time. The great Magician himself… Neptune, my dear friend.

It’s hard to imagine where I am… these last two months of being sick… selling and moving. With my Sun on the IC… Home is super important to me.

I’ve been through so much… possibly the hardest thing yet… and that’s saying something.

I’m still making my way back… I have to adapt to where I am everyday.

I’m alive… and that’s my priority.

Much Love… 🐸🧡🧡🐸

This one’s been big… 🐯

It’s been extraordinarily deep, this move. Bit like as if I’m moving universes. With all the galactic movement happening in our cosmic space… of course mirroring inside of us… we could well and truly be doing that… shifting universes.

But man… it’s hard on the body. Especially this 3/4 century, bit Fae… top of the scale finely tuned model. I haven’t experienced one as big as this before.

It makes a difference… it does. Our life path is full of all these spiralling cycles… we go through all these transformations. We travel worlds inside ourselves.

It’s an extraordinary process. It’s originality and purity is exquisite. But at times not for the faint of heart. It takes courage to be true. To want what’s real.

*Growth* has always called me… from as long back as I remember. I was on the hunt to know and to understand… to experience.

We had this allocated time… to fit in all our exploring, learning and processing… unwrap our reality. What an opportunity.

The miracle that life is.

And the beauty… my god.

A life is an amazing thing… All it makes possible.

Covid knocked me… it’s a weird one. I haven’t given it too much thought… did all that last few years… I was just dealing with it in my body. And still am… it’s a nasty bugger.

And moving. Always a big one for me. It activates some very deep body/psyche memories in me. Well, trauma also registers in the body. It intertwines into our systems.

I noticed it yesterday… I recognised it immediately. I was in freeze. I felt paralysed, unable to do anything. All I could do was lie on the bed and watch a series on my phone (My Mac died).

I’ve never had such a clear body awareness of trauma before. It was so clear. So visible. So visceral. My system was in freeze. Then I understood… I’m in a trauma response.

No wonder it’s been so f**king hard. A few times I’ve said ‘I can’t do this…’.

So… an opportunity to self love even more.

How amidst it all? There is always a way.

I deeply value my life.

Getting our priorities clear… no time for compromise. Life is valued

2023… another big year.

I’ve been swimming every day… across the creek to the mangroves on the other side. High tide the ocean water is beautifully clear.

Magick healing dust.

There’s a gorgeous resident snake that’s been camping front and back of my cabin for days. Healing magick is in process.

Much Love to me… ❤️🌺❤️

Two weeks left… 🧑🏻‍🦳

It’s been a helluva ride emotionally😯

It’s good for me… to have my emotions more visible. It’s been a journey… activated a lot during my somatic coaching training.

I spent a lot of time in this cabin doing that training… sitting comfy on my bed, looking out at the magick mangroves and creek.

My whole journey back here in the northern rivers has been dedicated to that focus… releasing a deeper part of me.

I needed a place to stand still … after a year of moving from place to place. Heavy with grief after leaving the Sacred Site.

You just gotta keep letting go. You can’t hold on to things. Everything keeps moving, morphing, spiralling.

You don’t have the power to hold it all. You’re a witness… and man, how much exquisite enjoyment and raptured joy you receive from having that gift.

Life’s a miracle. And so vastly generous.

Yeah… then there’s the hard bits. Being alive, all that entails. But who would swap it?

Letting go… gently pulling away all the chords that join you. Unite you… merge your beings together.

I’m so grateful I get to feel it all… the whole journey. That I honour it, I give it time, I surrender to it.

It can feel hard to feel a lot… but who would swap it?

Just remembering the love… the care, the gentle holding… of yourself. As you walk through these massive transformations.

All good practice.

Much Love to you🧡🧑🏻‍🦳🧡

Beauty… 🌺❤️

We get into habits with our thinking… as we do with our routines.

My Capricorn Moon can get into Ms Grumpy… strangely I’ve hardly ever noticed her. My Ms Nice & Accommodating taking centre stage.

At least she’s visible now… that’s happened during Covid. I met Ms Grumpy. It felt quite satisfying meeting her, like she was a lost part of me. Then there’s the guilt. Of not being nice.

I’ve always experienced that ‘sickness’ brings gifts… it’s a powerfully transforming time. The sacred body doing what she knows so well… her power of focus on the whole… all working in harmony. Maintaining the sacred vibration.

Such a miraculous creation.

Then there’s the larger cycles we’re a part of… my personal astrological cycles in synchronicity with the events that surround me.

Symbols fascinated me as a young girl… during my highly creative pubescent years it all came rushing in.

I was ‘good’ at maths… I loved them. I especially loved algebra and geometry. That led on to all the so called mystical arts.

When I first discovered astrology… during that sacred time of moving from child into woman… I said to myself immediately… ‘it’s an ancient science’. I knew that inside me.

So another time of experiencing the peak of a cycle, a time of endings and new beginnings. They always take so much… and give so much in return. If we can only muster the courage.

Maybe as we journey… we grow in depth and capacity… to receive all that life has for us.

Having no limits.

Yet loving boundaries. As our love for self grows.

Today’s the 4th… the 20th the movers come. Cabin’s in chaos… an interesting state for a Virgo.

It’s been a power packed month.

A lot’s happened and is happening during this entrance into 2023.

Feeling it all… 🌺🧑🏻‍🦳🌺

It’s hard… 😔💛

This is about my fourth attempt… everything sounds far away, trying to analyse, give some kind of meaning. When really it’s mostly emotional.

Virgo, Gemini, Capricorn aren’t known for their free flow of emotions. My ‘make-up’ tends to go to my head.

When everything feels different. And you feel like your being in a whole new person. You’re not who you were… and also not who you’re becoming. Bit like our world that is spinning in transition at present.

Talk about a double whammy.

There are moments when the letting go feels excruciating. I’d thought I’ve experienced that deep grief of leaving something so special… but heh, I guess everything keeps on spiralling.

It’s like there’s no way back. Oh boy, have I had that experience before. And the door to what’s ahead is still closed. You find yourself trembling in your boots on the step of the closed door, too scared to knock. You’ve no idea what’s on the other side.

Fear they say is a common human emotion. I’ve often considered fear to be my primary emotion… connecting to the kidneys which have too been a sensitive part of my energetics.

The virus I had as a child gave them a bit of a wallop… plus the associated trauma. I’ve been so taken care of… with my body’s super power of renewal. She’s truly a wonder.

Viruses… I’ve had a few, and my body is still taking care of me. She’s certainly impressive.

Just 10 days now out of the Covid haze… what a journey that is. Everything keeps on changing. I’m standing in a new space. It’s both fascinating and terrifying.

My home has sold… packing boxes everywhere. I don’t know where to next. I wonder why I do this to myself. And in my f**king three quarter century year… which is simply wild (I think😮).

Everything has changed… I’ve experienced this before. The intensity of it… the both visual and visceral experience of it. The holding on for grim death… being yanked to let go. Resisting, terrified.

I’m such a mixture of so much. Such depth to my feeling nature. An innate need for freedom… space to experience and explore… be all of me. This lust for life.

It’s a wild ride.

I hope some of this makes sense…

To bravery and courage… and joy in letting go… allowing room for more of me to be.

Much Love🧡🌺🧡

Moving thru the process… 🥰

This is my 3rd day on my comfy bed… still in my PJ’s morning till night. I try to recall when I last showered.

Sunday was goodbye day… standing on the station… half in, half out… the clock clicking down.

Nervousness, anxiety, tears gathering… new experiences enveloped in the old and familiar. New depths of feeling. Sensations unfamiliar.

2023 certainly started with vigour and intensity… shielded and softened by a protective shield.

So much happening all at once. So much growth, so much evolvement. New chapters birthing… old slipping away. So much is possible having a life.

I didn’t get Covid… or so I believe. Not that I recognised anyway. I was devoted to my best Vitamin C… I felt free in my actions and I took care of myself.

Sickness is both relatable and seemingly mysterious. I know a bit about it… my life started early with it. I’m no delicate, fragile flower. I have a core of solid Earth.

My dear suffering Dad (from the war)… was a philosopher thru and thru. Most times he opened his mouth… out they came.

There were many that accompanied me through my growing up years… the most famous of them being (at least by its impression on me)… ‘there’s no such thing as a coincidence’.

That has helped me make sense of things. Being what’s often referred to as a ‘Sensitive’… my range of feeling, sensation and internal understanding is considerable.

It helped me take my life experiences as a support and tool for growth. At heart I’m a true adventurer 😊😊

There’s supposed Gypsy blood in my line… which explains a bit.

And then… all we know is here and now. This gorgeous breath that brings me life. I am so grateful for that.

I suspect there’s many layers involved in my need to lay on my bed. The human body continues to amaze me. It’s amazed me all my life.

So this moving… another adventure… pulling up my roots… letting go… believe and trust in self… understanding Life… feeling it… trusting it.

Home and family… over this Cancer Full Moon… has been off the scale.

I guess we should be used to it now… this increase in everything as the years progress.

Moving thru the final days/years of an Age… what an extraordinary experience.

We certainly need to take exquisite care of our precious self. No one else can do that for you.

And upgrade the level on that too! 🏵️🏵️

There is nothing more important than you … full stop.

Much love, peace and happiness to you💛💝💛