Allowing it to be… ๐Ÿง–โ€โ™€๏ธ

My special find at the markets yesterday๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ

It’s not easy allowing things to just be. Because we rub up against each other… causing a friction, some response or reaction.

I lay in bed last night attempting to sleep… my frightened and panicking little girl could not be quietened.

I tried the things I do… still no success. I did some tapping… it’s worked for me before. But what came out ~ the words from my mouth ~ were incredibly revealing.

I became aware of latent trauma in action.

It’s easy to be harsh… expect more of our self. Rise the bar of what will be tolerated. What is acceptable. What makes ‘sense’. Our small child whimpers and cries… but mostly we’re unconscious of her presence.

Our child that lives inside of us.

Much of the time I’m completely unaware of the internal triggers that are causing the freakout… the response, the reaction. The outside events that cannot be reasoned away… or distanced from, to demonstrate clear and common sense. Clear and logical thinking.

No… nothing so superfical will quieten her when she’s awakened .

We live in a world connected to so many things. People, places, rules and regulations. Leaders, workers ~ all in between. Relationship is a constant state of being. We have a relationship with everything. Our interaction, our relationship, our connection to this ‘thing’ (whatever it is) creates an impact… which affects us in a most own unique and personal way.

There is no one size fits all.

Relationship is our greatest teacher. The opening of a door on a deeper level inside us.

I’m trauma aware… both in my personal life and in my training and ‘work’. I’m energy sensitive… so I can often feel it and see it. I am not a trauma expert. But I have considerable experience within it.

Past events don’t disappear. Never really go away. They’re a building block of our very structure. A melody that plays through our aura. A light, a colour. A shape. A personality.

There are techniques, ways of approaching that can lessen the charge created by these lingering events, now lodged in the physical. And some can be very impactful. But some level of that memory, that reliving, that tender part of me will always be there.

Learning to Love myself, truly love myself… more and more deeply, has been a lifetime journey. An (often) unconscious mission. But one I’ve become more consciously aware of these last few years.

We move in degrees… the more conscious we are of what we want, who we are and where we desire to be… can facilitate this leap in awareness and state of being.

Charges to our traumatic pieces (lodged in our physical body) hurt when they are activated. It’s like some part of me is right back there… experiencing it all.

Often the signature of these unconscious repeating events… is their intensity. It’s as if my very life is threatened… that I’m facing annihilation. All the alarms are screaming.

We all carry trauma ~ psychological, physical and emotional memories, to various degrees of intensity.

The passage of time we as a global community are currently walking through (in some manner or another) is highly activating. And can and is reactivating many things in many people.

We need kindness and love. Understanding. True intelligence. Compassion. Care.

Not swords and blood and wars. Judgements and separations. And please lighten up on the sarcasm… ‘the lowest form of wit’. A bugbear of mine๐Ÿ˜ 

I’d not visited the place I went last night. Amidst the screaming, the pleading alarms, the intensity of response… that level of captivity, I clearly saw why. I saw the bleeding scar… the depth of the vulnerability. The sweet and oh so deeply tender, delicate and priceless vulnerability.

The wound, the shock, the confusion… replaying, reconnecting to times before. Other events. Stamped clearly. Solidly weaved in the framework of my mortal existence.

Doesn’t mean I can’t be happy… of course. But I can become aware of the deeper layers of my self. I can see and understand the presence of my vulnerability. Learning to be even more kind… deeply kind, to my self. To love my self like I never have.

I believe that’s a lifetime mission.

Give myself time… give myself space. Get all the love where and when I can. Store myself up with mountains of Light and Love.

Globally we’re not out of the woods. Seems ‘things’ are still heating up… becoming bigger, more. I sense there’s much on the horizon. On many levels.

There’s no way of escaping it… at least not physically. We all Iive here on Earth. It’s probably a great time to store up and gather all our internal resources. Make it a priority during this passage.

I’ve been feeling for a while and saying it often. ‘I think things are going to happen a lot faster than we’ve expecting’.

I’m no expert… on anything. I mean what does an ‘expert’ even mean? When I was young I thought about the word intelligence a lot. I heard the word spoken a lot. I was called intelligent. I looked at others that were called intelligent. And something didn’t gel. Didn’t fit. From where I was standing, what I was seeing the things that were being labeled ‘intelligent’ didn’t look intelligent to me at all.

I never really did get to the bottom of it (logically that is๐Ÿ˜ƒ)… except to sense that real intelligence was more connected to wisdom. Connected to knowing. Not just the repeating of things we read and learn… other people’s words (not our own). Our own knowing can never be disputed.

It’s a vital part of our self we’ve lost touch with. It’s truly time for a revival.

Trauma. Love. Compassion. Tenderness. Vulnerability. Caring. Kindness.

Moving to another level of being human.

Much love ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿง–โ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ’œ

Feeling it all๐Ÿ˜Œ

The cuts are deep… ravaging my skin, cutting open revealing the grief.

It’s stored, its held… it’s tender, it’s hard.

Opening the gates to feeling… brave soul you are. Monstrous waves washing all clean. If you make it out alive.

Words are hard to find… they rise up in sensations. My body guides me… the only voice I understand.

The rest confuses me. What I see and what I hear don’t often meet.

The cuts are deep… bloody, sore. Depths of pain rocking me to sleep. Some I need to keep afar… not brave enough to come face to face just yet.

Then there are moments… out of the blue, or is the galactic pool of wisdom… they descend.

Mind’s blown by what appears.

The only me I know… is the one deep inside me. All the rest… like a slide show reel of passing movement… was once and are no more.

Yet I breathe… I’m still here. Miracles happening every day.

The cuts are deep… am I brave enough to allow? To face the grief, the sorrow. To love myself through the confusion.

As lifetimes pass… all shapes and sizes. Different faces. A multitude of places. Moments pass… days, weeks, months, years. A lifetime. I’m here… I breathe.

The cuts are deep… do they have a purpose?

What do they reveal? The spark of truth that keeps me sane.

The cuts are deep… they move me to a place unknown, unfamiliar… yet me inside there all the time.

I let go and I am taken.

I am strong… the cuts will heal. I never forget myself… never ever.

I never surrender what I know… as solid as the ground I walk on.

I pull on courage from all my helpers.

๐Ÿงก๐ŸŒบ๐Ÿงก

Strength… ๐Ÿงก

The waters have calmed. Boy… what a tumultuous storm that was. Pisces is a best’est mate of mine… I carry lots of her inside me. Pisces Full Moons have always been my favourite. Moon light magick trysts… into the magickal lands behind the veil.

I know these lands. They’re there. They’re real… just hidden from sight. At least our physical awarenessโ€ฆ matter is but energy after all.

The stillness is remarkable after the violence of the storm. The flooding of our emotional bodies… was intense and excessive. The sheer power of that volcanic underworld force.

My body raged… it hurt, it struggled. It went deep. It reacted, it responded… felt the totality: of the grief, the anger, the rage. The shock… the injustice.

What have we become?

Today the storm has passed.

My sensory perceptions are deepening. I need to cultivate the strength to welcome them all. Love and invite them all into the royal chamber of my heart.

Not just shore sitting… watching from a safe distance. Holding the barriers. Creating reason. Squeezing things into an acceptable form.

These Full Moons are getting stronger… everything is. Or is it us… is it me? Are we shifting at a truly rapid speed.

Looking back over the months… everything’s illuminated. Each day’s been significant… each journey momentous. Deeply rich in colour and texture. New narratives descending… momentary and continual awakenings.

Each individual journey moving so fast. Entering the blackness, the dark of the tunnel… pulled, pushed, shoved… wounded and bloody. A violent interaction. Then catapulted… spit out the other side. A different you.

The speed of transformation is enormous. Everything’s getting faster and faster. It’s extraordinary what’s happening.

These times are wild… for sure.

And sometimes it’s just hard.

Hard to witness… the inhumanity. The destruction. The lies. The manipulation. All the stuff.

I remind myself… adjust my focus. Be the Faerie child I am… frolic in the magick. Know the reality. Never forget what’s true and real.

Yet being present now. And playing my part.

Allowing and loving all of me… every face, every purpose, every personality. They all have a sacred task.

No not schizophrenia… we have multiple faces, multiple personality strands. Full flows of emotions… the rivers, lakes and estuaries in our emotional bodies. All having their purpose and their need to express.

Demanding space to live and love.

We’re not just one thing… we’re many. We can love and live within them all.

Feelings and emotions are sacred messengers. They’re asking us to listen, to pay attention. The supreme wisdom of our glorious human body is one we’ve still yet to truly understand. The art of this was buried long ago.

The depth and wisdom and presence of our internal waters. Pisces welcomes us into this deep and unexplainable world.

Trusting in me… loving myself is imperative. Everything begins here.

It’s difficult out there at present… lots of cries for help.

There’s NEVER a reason to surrender our humanity. Never. That’s something we can never doโ€ฆ without dire and catastrophic consequences.

The emotional storm has passed… at least for now.

Celebrating strength.

Strength always sees us safe to the other side.

Much Love to you ๐Ÿงก๐ŸŒบ๐Ÿงก

Breathing in the goodness… ๐Ÿงšโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿงšโ€โ™€๏ธ

magick track down to the waves๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

My second play in the waves… in two days๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

Weather’s warming… Spring’s here. Summer’s usually close on her heels.

The ocean is turbulent… has been for a while. The winds stirring things up… and we’re building to a full moon. In Pisces no less… Pisces ruler Neptune, King of the Oceans.

I have a healthy respect for the ocean… especially knowing what its like to be pulled out in a rip. Ocean is powerful… not one to fool around with. S/he welcomes us… loves us to be with her; play and absorb her extraordinary healing magick.

After a generous frolicking… being careful of those tugs that like to pull… I returned to shore. The wind not so gusty today… I lay out my towel and gave over my body to Sun’s magick healing rays.

I don’t ‘sunbathe’ a lot these days… have done in previous years. I take a bit more care of my skin.

But lying there this morning, and yesterday… feeling the powerful vibration of Ocean rumble into my body… absorbed through my back as I lay directly on the sand.

I felt the power of it… the sheer primordial power. Ocean said that to me once. I’d asked long enough. Was when I first moved to where I’m living. I’d had a ‘call’… asking me to come. It was real alright. Ocean called me. I had no idea why… except of course for the surface reason of relaxing on the beach and swimming in the ocean. A great way to recover from the mammoth move from my property.

For about the first year here in the cabin… snuggled into the mangroves off Simpson’s Creek… I would go down for dawn on the South Wall (where Brunswick River comes in from the ocean)… and I’d ask. Every day I would ask… ‘why am I here?’

There was never a reply. I figured ocean doesn’t waste many words. He/She is not a big talker (from my experience). Well at least in English๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

Then one day. And it hadn’t been the same old question… ‘why am I here?’ It was a different expression. I’d asked how I could help to heal the oceans. You know all the plastic and god knows what else dumped in there.

Ocean was quick to respond. The first time… down there on the wall, after all my questioning.

‘It’s humans who need to heal… you don’t realise how powerful we are’.

Short and sweet.

Lying there with my bare back on the sand… absorbing the warmth, the presence, the softness. I noticed… I was also absorbing these powerful vibrations… the ocean coming up from underneath me. I pulled the power into my body. Asked for its strength. Requested the ability to absorb from nature all I need to be strong and vital.

It’s all around us… this healing magick.

It’s a crazy time here on Earth at present… nothing to do with Earth or her millions of creatures. Just us humans. Why do we make a mess of things?

Yes, yes… the last days (years etc) of what some call patriarchy… the capitalistic profit before people, the complete disconnection from the natural world. The greed. The lust for power and control.

This is where it’s taken us folks.

And the big weather changes haven’t even started yet.

But sigh… my vote goes for Love and Light.

The two most powerful in the entire galaxy of galaxy of galaxies. Well maybe they’re the same thing.

That one Great Power… Great Spirit. I thank you.

๐Ÿงก๐Ÿงšโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿงก

Resistance ~ Lethargy ~ Demotivation…๐Ÿง–โ€โ™€๏ธ

Birthday Girl๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

I’m familiar with there being different dimensions of feeling. Worlds of them out there reflected within. Especially with an ‘Out of Bounds’ Moon.

It’s an astro/astronomy thing…

When a planet is termed ‘OOB’ (Out of Bounds) it’s when their declination is more than 23* 26′ 22” (a bit over 23 degrees)… north or south of the equator. The maximum northward and southward migration of the Sun at the Solstice from an earth based perspective.

(declination = ‘angular distance north or south from the celestial equator measured along a great circle passing through the celestial poles’ Meriam Webster)

In astro lore OOB planets are considered Maverick. They follow their own path… do their own thing. They’re not contained within the ‘middle’… the collective gathering place of the masses. They’re out of reach of the ruler… the King. They explore their own places… they travel far beyond the boundaries.

They have access to a wider view. They have access to foreign lands… uncharted landscapes. Their need to know and explore is inbuilt. They crave the bigger picture… the world beyond the small and limited.

Depending on the planet and it’s ‘meaning’ (how it impacts us) it’s personality and way of operating… OOB takes these characteristics and magnetises them a thousand fold. Opening new worlds to our view.

My Moon… the placement of the Moon at the time of my birth, was OOB. She’d gone off to explore.

So when taking my first breath in this new home of mine Earth… my feelings were already expanded a thousand fold. They came as part of the package.

I’ve had trips back to the time I arrived. Yeah sounds fanciful… some of us are just like that. And I don’t think it’s peculiar to some of us… the human brain and nervous system… the whole human body, has a far greater capacity than we’ve currently collectively considered. That’s my experience.

Perception is a powerful tool we’re given. I guess it depends where we aim it, where we focus it. What we use it for.

Like a high powered telescope built into our body… our seeing can expand exponentially.

Resistance ~ Lethargy ~ demotivation have been visiting. For a while now. I’ve become increasingly aware of their deadening presence.

I do what I can… usually hop on my bike and head for the bush, clear open spaces… miles of silence. Just Life Being… holding me. Showing me the truth. Caressing my fields. Refilling my tank. Awing me again and again.

That Sacredness you can touch, feel, smell, taste and hear. That fills your energy fields with its sacred self.

Sometimes I feel so weary. So tired. Yesterday I made it down to the nature reserve… didn’t explore as much as I usually do. Found a familiar place to sit by the river… feel life around me, holding me. Caressing me. Reminding me what’s real.

I think I’m just bone weary of it all. Each time I gotta pull out my mobile (I never used to take it with me) ferret round for my mask… the weariness gets heavier. I feel myself weighty, descending to the floor.

Nature’s magnificence is all around me where I live. I know I have so much to be lifetimes grateful for. Gratitude is not foreign to me. But I’m human… I have this magnificent feeling nature, a gift so often. I get to travel worlds of feeling. I wouldn’t swap it for the world. Being me.

Regardless what side of the fence you sit… and yes there is a fence, getting sturdier each day. I try not to give it too much air time. But yeah I’m human… living in a technological world. Difficult to escape things… when sometimes our only connections are virtual. Ugh.

Yesterday… sitting at the edge of the river, being with the tide as it was heading back home, I went back to another time of my life… when something was said to me. At least something I was present for.

My dearest friend, teacher, mentor, guide (Prem Rawat)… last fifty years. That’s quite a while… was telling a story. A story from back in Ram and his wife Seta’s time.

Seta asked Ram about the Kali Yuga (the Dark Age). ‘What will it be like’… she asked. Ram answered… telling her all the things that would transpire. (A horror story of sorts).

Sita looked at Ram and said… ‘Will there be anything that is good during this time?’

His reply ‘Knowledge (of the Self) will be freely available.’

I didn’t stay as long as I normally do down in the nature reserve. My body felt so heavy. My eyes wanting to close. I was feeling the weight of everything.

I went back to my waiting rusty trusty friend (my bike) she took me back through the beauty… back to my cabin. I snuggled on a lounge positioned to catch the sun and finished my novel.

Much Love to you โค๏ธ๐ŸŒบโค๏ธ

Happy Birthday ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’

It’s a Sunday this year… Moon in Scorpio. Venus too… hmmmm an erotic year ahead.

I’m here in my body ~ reached another milestone. Completed a round… opened a new door. Well… to be exact won’t be till 11.40pm tonight. I’m sure to be asleep.

The Wonders of Life. There’s so many. So many gifts… just keep on coming. Yeah there are hard times… those roads you crawl on bloodied knees. But there’s always someone there. Always a helper by your side. You truly never do walk alone.

There’s a newness about… it’s gentle and soft, just taking shape. Don’t want to rush it… as I’m sometimes want to do. Give it lots of space to fill itself out.

There’s still so many things I desire… things to accomplish, new places to be. New people around. To feel a true sense of belonging is not easy for me.

I’ve heard that said about Virgo… this ‘man-made’ world is not her space. It’s gross and it’s awkward… all sharp bits and chaotic spaces. She’s much more comfortable in her temple of clarity. Away from all the noise and discord.

I’m gonna let it flow today. I’m going to follow my flow. I’m going to be listening a lot more lovingly. I’m going to trust me in a way I haven’t before.

I’m going to feel it pull me… it knows what I desire. I’m gonna put a break on the push… dissolve the lack. Remember that Trust has been with me since the start.

Life is the greatest thing. None can compare.

Just a wisp of a second we come to stay… well in the whole scheme of things.

My desires I carry in the flame of my heart.

I feed them with my knowing… my love and honouring.

I’ve never been let down… not once. At least by Life.

That constant presence… by my side.

That Love… I find nowhere else.

Yet when I’m in it… it’s everywhere.

So I’ll sit and do my practice… eat some food. Hop in my beloved Beth… and set off. Let Life surprise me… take me where I’ll find the best. It’s waiting. Oh yes it’s been waiting for me.

It’ll be grand when we meet.

Another chapter… each one more amazing than the last. That’s what Life does… just keeps getting better.

Who would’ve thought. You don’t read that in the papers. Well unless you read my column in the Nimbin Good Times ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

So I’m going to go with the flow… a big one for me. So purposeful and intent I can be… my Scorpionic Mars taking lead of the charge.

But I’m gonna give him a rest. Let the flow permeate my fields.

I’m going to have the most wondrous day.

I’m gonna celebrate me… celebrate being alive.

Happy Birthday Marilyn… you are the best. We’ve walked this path together… and here we are… come to a brand new bus stop.

The coolest bus ever… is on her way.

Much Love to you… ๐Ÿ’๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’

what a journey๐Ÿ™

I want to freeze time ~ hold it here. This day before my birthday.

I want to stretch it out… make it last. Create a whole world with it. Play in there for ages.

Create a life… bring it into being. Things I love.

There’s a quality of magick permeating the air.

I’ve come out the other side… of the tunnel. It was dark. Many I’ve been through. Become a bit of an explorer of those places. At the time it can be pretty intense. I am human.

There’s a lot of Light.

I know to be prepared… alert. Where there’s Light there’s shadows.

Standing on the doorstep of this magickal cycle… 73 ๐Ÿ’. Was the best year ever 1973.

You don’t get many like them.

Extraordinary… Divine. Out of this World. Off the Planet… Gifts beyond belief. Light… like a tornado.

Dark shrivels and dies… conquered. Won. Home… lifetimes forever complete.

Yes a precarious step I stand upon. The door soon to open.

Grace has showered me… covered me like glitter. That purposeful intent… and oh so courageous little girl. Stacked up with all that power and courage… they knew she’d be needing it.

‘Where Angels fear to tread’… my Dad often said, to my brother. Mine more demure, quiet, hidden, soft, caring. But there.

Oh yes it was there… it is there.

The track to this step has been thorny indeed. All kinds… all sorts banging into me. Scratching me, knocking me down. Trying to annihilate.

See ~ how strong you are.

That tiny form grown to large… crossed over another fence. Heading into ‘old’ age.

Man ~ like who could ever imagine. Not until you’re here does the miracle reveal itself.

I want to stretch this day forever… make a life of it. Life begins anew with each new breath.

I praise them, I adore them… call them to my side. They’re my lovers, my protectors… they’re my God. My everything.

I want to celebrate my Life.

I want… I will expand into this space.

I want to merge with this time… make it mine.

I’m a gift from God. Only one of me made. Just the other day I got a true glimpse of that. Experienced it in the here and now. In my body… where it showed itself to be real.

It was extraordinary… one of a kind. In the whole universe of everything. In all times ever.

And I still have breath.

I stand on this step… the door soon to open. On a whole new Marilyn.

I can never really reveal my gratitude. Often it lies silent deep in my soul. But when I go I shall sing it through all the air.

I’m hoping to be here for a while… if that’s ok๐Ÿ˜ƒ

It’s the coolest thing being here on Earth… where the magick happens (despite the Shit Show๐Ÿ˜Œ).

Miracles unfolding… breath after breath.

And yes… May I never forget.

And sigh… we’re ‘free’ today (lockdown lifted here) ๐Ÿ„๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ„

May Love forever be your guide โค๏ธ๐Ÿงกโค๏ธ

Self Compassion ๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’—

I went to see my counsellor yesterday… first time a few weeks back… in a while .

She really helped me through a particular passage. It was during my training when old trauma got activated. Trauma I never knew I had.

In the coaching world ~ Trauma’s been a bit of a buzz word. It can be off-putting when things get ‘trendy’. It does for me. Virgo desiring purity. What’s real and true.

A challenging goal at times.

I made the appointment as I’d been feeling flat… my usual trust and eagerness sitting like a puddle on the floor. I wondered… ‘is this a form of depression?’

It was subtle… not that intense trauma reaction that has you just wanting to die. Sliding down into black holes… you never knew existed.

No ~ it was much more subtle than that.

But it was obvious.

I’ve always been one that’s quietly driven. Enthusiasm in spades… find what lies around the corner. Under the surface.

My life’s been one huge adventure. I’ve been fearless, open, willing to have a go. My curiosity knows no boundary lines. I was a gleeful student of life.

I was clever… thanks to my heritage. I had a powerful intuition. Friends tell me things I said to them years ago. I don’t remember. Can’t see myself even saying such a thing.

I wondered… was I in some kind of trance? Was it a message just zipped down to me… and out it came from my mouth.

I don’t know.

I was fearless. I also carried a heap’a fear in my cells. It walked close to me my whole life. But I was fearless all the same.

I was an adventurer, an explorer… a pioneer. I just needed to find out what it was all about. I never gave up. No matter what struck… I’d brush myself off and go again.

I’ve learned a lot. I’ve observed a lot. I have a killer (in the nicest way๐Ÿ’) Instinct. It’s a powerful thing.

I’ve had my wounds. My life’s been one of Healing and the Healer. It plays music through my veins.

I feel connection to those who came before me. I’ve seen them. They sometimes visited.

In my youth I held for my very life… to my intellect. It was clever they told me. I doubted anything that couldn’t be explained. I constantly tried to drown out anything that just didn’t make sense.

I mean how can these things really happen?

They’ll think you’re mad. You can’t have that. You’ll be separated from the tribe. You know what will happen… it’s happened before. The memories and vision of which still play on your screen.

History repeats itself. Again and again. Till we learn.

I like my counsellor… I feel comfortable with her. I went feeling tired, like all my air had gone… a deflated balloon. But that often happens to me during Dark of Moon.

But I could feel it enough to make the appointment. Something lingering on the edge… could see it through the corner of my eye.

Depression… is that what it is?

Talking together… I kept getting distracted. Into the superficial, the practical, the surface. Fortunately she could see me… offered me another road, redirect my focus. Back into my body.

You’d think after all the years of training in somatic coaching I’d be an expert๐Ÿ˜Œ๐Ÿ˜Œ

Well… we always work on our self first.

I stopped my jabbering of inconsequential… noticed my sneaky one that loves to distract me. She’s cheeky.

I settled in my body.

I saw myself dissolve… into a puddle on the floor.

She invited me to go deeper into this.

She kindly lay down a mat and a blanket to cover me with. I felt safe. Well almost.

I curled into a bundle… making myself smaller and smaller. Trying to disappear.

But there were two things going on.

There was movement too… an electrical kind, like nerve energy impulses.

She invited me to let them both be.

I did… went from one to another. Let them be there… and express.

Then the screaming started… silently of course (my body contracts as I write those words).

My pride still in tact.

It was the loudest, piercing scream. Like an energetic force forming a rod and piercing it up to the sky. It was a powerful scream. Like it contained all of me. I gave my all to it.

I’ve heard that scream before. I’ve had many ‘going backs’… a weird quirk of mine. Could be all the Neptune๐Ÿ’™

I’d heard that scream… relived that scream, many times.

Then came the ‘No’s these were less energetic… she’d been exhausted by that full bodied scream.

But they continued and repeated.

Then I was spent… my breathing through it all changed rapidly. I became still, everything quiet. Back to the puddle… yet it was no longer water. There was some substance.

I came back. Wiped some tears. I felt really tired. Still back at home… till I went to bed.

Another slow day… nurturing myself.

It’s beautiful working with the body. She’s simply amazing. Truly amazing. I love our relationship. She’s such a Powerful Healer.

Be kind to yourself. Extra kind and Loving. Lots of stuff being activated. Man ~ talk about ‘them’ putting on a show’ (the dark side๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ)

Doing lots of loving things for You. Luxuriating in full body sensation. Wherever you are in yourself right now… no judgement. Judgement is ugly.

Luxuriate in Goodness. In Yourself. More than just accepting where you’re at right now… but actually Loving it. Adoring it unconditionally.

Powerful Healing Magick

It’s Virgo time… how perfect

much love ~ ๐Ÿงก๐Ÿ„๐Ÿงก

changing gears ๐Ÿ„

We all need magick.

Lots is good. There’s plenty around… just take a quick squiz about your person. That stuff is everywhere.

I’m a huge fan of magick… that magick feeling that tickles your skin. Tingles your insides. Harmonises your cells. That feeling you remember… like it’s been there forever. You know it so well.

It’s where you feel at home. At rest… one with yourself. One with everything around you. You exhale the loudest sigh.

It’s like a silky golden honeyed liquid that pleasures all your senses… even the ones you never knew you had. Your body responds. Mind stills. Heart swells… responding to the overflow of love.

A belonging you hunger for… showers over you extravagantly.

There’s no measly mouthed misers here… everything flows abundantly.

No need for FOMO… it never runs dry, this magick well is always full. It flows from an infinite source. You only need to show up. No questions asked. No forms to fill. No passports, entrance exams… no judgements, ridicule, restrictions or gaols. Nah… all free here.

I’m a big fan of magick land. Some think it’s pretend. I know it’s not. Magick’s there all the time. It never goes away.

You only need to turn up.

You’re never turned away.

In fact you’re welcomed with open arms… a gleeful smile… a generosity that awes you at first. You’re just not used to it.

How can anything be so kind… so giving? So present. So full. So always there?

Never disappoints. Never turns away. Always welcoming… takes you into her fold. Recognises you immediately… a long lost friend. Feels like you’ve never parted… just drifted off somewhere.

Sometimes the contrast is enormous.

Yeah… I’m a fan of magick. I’ve seen heaps.

I’ve walked in it, swam in it, danced in it… absorbed it into my skin.

I’ve seen it with my eyes, heard it in my ears… tasted it on my tongue. Felt it nurture me.

It always welcomes me home.

I wander… but I hope I always return.

Easy to get lost… loose your way. Then you just let out a cry… and wiz bam you’re back. Magick it is.

I’m glad I’m a fan of magick… she’s a big part of me.

People think she’s pretend… I know she’s not.

She’s more real than anything else.

New Moon Blessings… Moon’s planted her seed just a short time ago. She’ll be hidden in the sky for a little bit longer… then out she’ll come shining her light… in that gorgeous little slip of an arc.

For such a little thing… she holds a great deal of power.

And this Virgo New Moon brings a whole heap of healing… I reckon we could do with heaps of that right now. Even with all the magick about.

Yeah… there’s plenty of things that are wrong… but even more that are right.

Just gotta find them… and shine a light on them.

Yeah… a challenge at times.

We fall down… then we get up again.

I’m in the countdown… finishing off my journey through the twelfth house. A brand new cycle about to start in another five days.

And another year older. You just can’t ever imagine you’d get this far. But I gotta be grateful I have. Even with all of it.

73…. gasp๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณ

may your journey been filled with heaps’a magick moments….

much love… marilyn๐Ÿงก๐Ÿ„๐Ÿงก

into the still and quietโ›บ๏ธ

The Sanctuary

Dark Moon time. I always feel it… like all the air has been released from my balloon. My energy is redirected into other places… my body left to rest.

New Moon in Virgo tomorrow. A Moon cycle is seeding the accumulative wisdom gathered over the last 28 days… preparing for a new cycle to birth.

These Dark Moon times are special… Moon’s absence can have you flat out on your back. Watching the world as it passes by.

Being a spectator… safe at home in your body.

Needing safety… a sense of belonging.

A time of journeying through shadow lands… hidden parts. Quiet voices usually drowned out. Amid all the activity and movement.

A highly Feminine time… being receptive. Open to receive the bounty. Letting go of the detritus. No longer needing shreds of living… once come to teach now ready to depart.

Quiet time needed… allows my inner world to be resourced by my vital force. Surrendering… being still. Listening… going deeper in my ears. What do I hear? What are the messages… just for me.

Feeling the softness… the insignificance, the greatness. The depths. The powerful yet achingly tender vulnerability.

The need, the desire… the surrender. Trusting.

Who am I at the root?

What drives me… to be here? What empowers me to take each step?

What is non negotiable?

What is my Love of Love of Loves?

What do I live for?

What will I take with me when I leave?

‘You’ ~ one unrepeatable, sacredly unique… extraordinarily special Life Creation. Given exclusively to you.

May New Moon Blessings shower us all.

marilyn๐ŸŒบ๐ŸŒ๐ŸŒบ