I promised myself a month… had slithering doubts whether I’d make it. I was hoping I could. I mean… not that it’s a monstrous task.
Memories fade. Yet some of them remain crystal clear. How is that? Who decides? Who chooses what stays at the front of the line?
The memory I was trying to pull back ~ was how I felt, as I did the last bits, gathered them all and sent them off.
The end of four years.
Saying that took me right back… that late day on the beach… only been here (back in the area) about 3 weeks. Had no intention of returning. Was just looking for affordable accommodation.
Next step on my road out of Mahalia (the Sacred Site I lived for 7 years).
So three weeks… I was just settling in. Takes a while. Mind moves fast, body moves slow.
I was on the beach… it was getting cold. Day was diminishing, dusk coming soon. Sky was pregnant with heavy weighty clouds… dark as night.
Will there be a chance… to catch a glimpse?
I was willing to wait and see.
Hours it was… as I sat and observed. Couples walking hand in hand. Kids running, playing in the sand. Lone walkers contemplating life… breathing in the magick air.
Surfers… communing with their beloved.
People swimming… having a dip. Jumping in the waves.
I sat and observed.
The hours kept chugging on… it was getting cold.
I wasn’t going to leave… till I caught at least a glimpse.
It’d been a very long time… since I had the chance to watch Moon rise out of the ocean.
It was the Virgo Full Moon… and she sat right on my Sun.
I sensed, as often is the way with me… that this Full Moon was significant. And I needed to be there to welcome her.
Hours built on hours… was almost tempted to leave.
Sky was black…
is there even a crack… that she’ll be able to slip through?
Almost at the point of standing… taking my cold body back to my lodgings…
in all her majesty
Black clouds or no… she’s never diminished
We got to commune.
But it was during that time… those hours on the beach
watching the interaction
of humans and the ocean
I began to feel.
It came on suddenly
hadn’t beckoned it
filled my mind.
Where did that come from?
Rarely ever give it a thought
I felt the fear… the anguish and the dread
like melted steel
pooled in my gut
It took a life…
overwhelmed the surrounds
I looked at the people
all of them… so many
I looked to the ocean
all the creatures in there
the whales and the dolphins
and all the rest… we rarely, if ever see
the combination of the two… was unthinkable
a catastrophe of unimaginable proportions
‘NO!’ it can’t happen
Then it came… from the pit of my soul
well… that’s what it felt like
I made a request… of the Goddess
Illuminated there in this Virgo Full Moon
‘Can you give me an answer… to heal the oceans?’
In my innocent awareness… I pleaded.
Of course I forgot… that day/night drifted from the top of my mind
I got on with living
being in a new place
But Life didn’t forget
Oh no… not that kind of request
It has a story
Four years forward… I took the road that opened
How will it all translate
create an outcome
we’ll just have to wait and see.
Three weeks ago… that memory I was trying to conjure
how I felt
as I finally sent off the last of my training
Four years… from way back then to now
As I pressed ‘send’
I promised myself I’d take one month off
I was exhausted
Well… there’s one week left.
I did it.
Wonder what’s next.
Ahhhh Life… by the courtesy of Breath.
Hope your day is magickal… if not, make it that way
I’m gonna try 🧚♀️🌷🧚♀️